Things I learned in Aruba

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17

Last week I left for a trip I never thought I would ever take.  Like never-ever.  If you know me, then you know I am NOT a traveler.  Like,  not even a little bit.  I was NOT born a ramblin' (wo)man.

In spite of my aversion to travel, I packed a suitcase, got on a plane (actually two) and flew to Aruba(thank you Xanax for all your help).  

See, Hubby had been working very hard to qualify for this incentive trip his employer gives to the top 40 service  reps.   He had been telling me for months how he and his coworker were working to earn it so we could all go together.  His hard work paid off and he(along with his coworker) was awarded an all expense paid trip for two to Aruba for 5 days.     So it was official.  We were going to Aruba.  I was excited to go (kind of), but my nerves were frayed to mere threads slightly agitated as I thought about all the things that needed to get done before I left.  AND I was extremely slightly nervous about the traveling part.   I hadn't been on a plane in over 20 years.  We had never been away from our kids.   We were able to get all the necessary arrangements made and the way it all worked out was such a blessing.  I am forever grateful to have gone on such a fantastic trip.

NOW, not being a world traveler-or any traveler for that matter- I learned a few things on this trip.   Here are some things I learned in Aruba.  

1.  If you get sick on the plane and need to use the barf bag, you can't put it back in the seat pocket.  REALLY?!!  What person made it necessary for the airline company to actually have to put that in writing.  Just WOW!  

2.  The bathroom in the airplane is perhaps the tiniest place to pee ever!  Mental note: limit fluid intake before flying.  AWKWARD!

3.  There is a Starbucks in Aruba!  Who knew?!  Hello beautiful.  HOORAY!!

4.  When choosing a sunscreen for use on a tropical island, it's probably best to stick with the lotion and NOT the spray.  OR, at least reapply spray inside.  See, when you spray yourself outside where there is constant breezy wind, the spray kind of misses spots.  You burn in splotches. So it hurts AND it looks weird.  OUCHIE!

5.  Do not, I repeat, do NOT forget to pack the Advil.  I packed every other pharmaceutical we had, but forgot the Advil.  After the plane ride I had a horrific headache.  We paid $8.50 for this bottle of 20 pills.  CHA-CHING!

6.  Sunset pics on the beach look neat.  BUT if you are wearing tennis shoes, you may want to ask the picture-taker to hurry along.  See those waves in the back there?  Well, they tend to wash up and soak your shoes.   SQUISHY!

7.  Nighttime beach walking is the best time to collect shells and coral. The waves bring all sorts of cool stuff onto the beach.  We even invited our friends to join us on our nightly beach walk so they too could experience the fun.  It's also the worst time.  In order to collect the stuff you have to endure the waves, with all the stuff in them, crashing in on your legs at varying heights.  But if you don't mind shards of broken shells and chunks of coral hitting your legs over and over then it's not so bad.  It's really fun to wait till the wave rolls out, run and grab handfuls of stuff, and run back before the wave hits you again.  Unless you're too slow.  Then your bootie gets wet.  RUN 

FOREST RUN. 

8.  You can't take it with you.  Having endured a night of painful seashell and coral collecting, you now have a neat little collection of sand and stuff to take home to your children.  Except then you find out it's illegal to take this "protected natural resource" out of Aruba.  Unless you want an astronomical fine, you must leave Aruba in Aruba.   So you just take a picture of it.  That's  almost as good as taking it home.  BUMMER!

9.  T.O.P does not spell HOT.  The resort has these neat little outside "shower the ocean and sand off of you" showers all around the place.  When your friend is rinsing his feet (after you've convinced him and his wife to join you on your nightly leg pelting seashell collecting walk on the beach, and he says "ooh that's cold" don't try and help.  See, the other push button thingy isn't for hot water, it's for the TOP shower(Hey, it was dark and I couldn't see well).  SO, when you try and help your friend get hot water for his feet, you actually spray him with cold water from the top shower.  OOPS!

10.  The banana boat ride is a little rough.  So Hubby and I went to scout out the banana boat ride we'd been hearing about.  We looked, and we saw this floating thing.  It looked sturdy, safe, fun even.  So we reported back to our friends and all climbed aboard this safe, sturdy vessel of fun.  Turns out you don't sit in the middle and hold on to the sides.  No.  You straddle the tubes on one side with your feet behind you.  You hope the weight distribution on each side is somewhat even so you don't immediately topple over.  You hold on for dear life while the driver is pulling you behind the boat,  laughing at your misfortune.  See, it's a very windy place, and as you ride over those white caps, the wind blows fiercely  and the salt water pelts you in the face.  It hurts.  Like a lot.  And you can't open your eyes or you get pelted in the eyes with windy, salty sea water-at least if you're in the front, which I was.  Also, it's very hard to climb back onto the floating boat of death when the driver decides to dump you all off into the middle of the sea.  While you're floating there like shark bait as the boat comes back around, you wonder if you have the upper body strength to pull yourself out of the water back onto the float.  It's more difficult than it looks.  It was fun.  Kind of.  Not really.  SCARY!

11.  Remember where you are sitting when you go up to the buffet.  SO, the resort had this cool buffet dinner and carnival show one evening.  We were one of the first groups to arrive.  The host gave us a great table close to where the show would be happening.   I went up to get a plate of food.  I went to the salad bar first and decided to put that plate on the table and go back for the main dish.  No one was back yet, so I just left my plate on the table.   When I came back with my second plate, my first plate was gone.  "HUH!  someone took my plate" I said.  So, I went back up and got another salad bar plate.  When I came back the second time, hubby looked at my plate, looked at me, pointed to the table behind us, and said,"Does that plate look like yours?"  There was one plate on an otherwise empty table behind us, and it had the same food on it as the one I had in my hand.   Turns out it was my first plate.  I just put it on the wrong table.  I know I have issues with directions and I get lost a LOT, but this was an all new level of being misplaced.  DUH!

12.  According to hubby and his friend, There is a difference between male and female palm trees.  I'm not even going to explain.  I like my blog to be somewhat "family friendly"   Not going there.  I'm sure you can figure it out.  However, I'm not so sure they really know what they're talking about.  KEEP IT CLASSY!

13.  You need to be fast when writing in the sand.  I was the designated "name in the sand" writer.  Why our friends trusted me to do this task after my previous blunders was beyond me.  Maybe they figured it would be fun to watch me scramble.  I did my best, but the results were less than ideal.  Oh well, we snapped a picture.  You can sorta kinda tell what it says.   HURRY HURRY!

14.  Beautiful places are more fun with friends.  It was such an unexpected blessing to be able to go on this trip.  To have friends experience this beautiful place with us was an added blessing.  I am so thankful these two hung out with us, even after my not-so-great ideas.  FRIENDS ARE BLESSINGS 

15.  Hubby and I still like each other, even after 20 years together.   Hubby and I began dating 20 years ago this past February and our 20 year wedding anniversary is in September.   Our lives are busy with work, homeschooling our kids, running our kids to gymnastics, and just. life.  Life is busy.  We just don't get a chance to spend much time together.  It was such an incredible blessing to have some time together to just be together.  No pressure, no money stress, no running here and there, just enjoying time together exploring a beautiful island.  We made a commitment to love one another always when we were married. And we've honored that commitment through some pretty trying times.   But come to find out, we still LIKE  hanging out together too.  What a blessing to still enjoy each other's company without life's distractions.  FRIENDS FOREVER

So I learned some things on this unexpected trip.  I also thoroughly enjoyed the beauty of the island, the sound and feel of the sea, the breeze, the sun, and the sand between my toes.  I enjoyed meeting new friends and spending time with friends we knew already.  It was a wonderful experience.

I am so incredibly grateful to my hubby for working so hard to earn this trip.  I'm so incredibly grateful to God for giving Hubby the strength and energy to do the job he does every day.  I'm grateful to God for creating such beauty in nature.   I'm so incredibly grateful to my friends who prayed for a safe, happy trip for us.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17

And I am just.simply.grateful.  so. SO. grateful.

Thanks for reading.

I get by with a little help from my friends.

What would you think if I sang out of tune,
Would you stand up and walk out on me.
Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song,
And I'll try not to sing out of key.
I get by with a little help from my friends,
I get high with a little help from my friends,
Going to try with a little help from my friends.-Billy Shears

Tonight I shared a cup of coffee with this girl who grew right into my heart.  We first met years ago when she was a young girl and I was just 20 years old.  Our lives intersected through her grandparents.   Somewhere along the way God placed her right into my heart where she grew to be my heart-daughter.  We share memories that bring both tears and laughter.   It had been 3/4 of a year since our last visit.  Far too long.  

I had dinner with some of my friends from high school a couple of weeks ago.  These girls-along with one who couldn't make it-were my sanity during my high school years.   We studied together, laughed together, ate junk food together, and watched lots of Saturday Night Live together (Party on, Wayne).  We all agree that we need to get together more often.  So much time passes all too quickly, and before we know it years stretch out between our visits.  

When I was very young, someone once told me "if you want to have friends, you have to show yourself to be friendly."  I wanted friends.  I really really wanted friends, so I prayed and did my very best to be a friend to anyone who'd have me as their friend.  God heard that small child's prayer, and I have been blessed throughout my lifetime with some great friends (I also include many family members who are also friends)

Some friends have come and gone.  I have learned from them and hope they have learned something from me.  It was a really hard thing for me to realize that not everyone comes in your life to stay.  I would love it if that were true, but it's not realistic.  This I have learned and have made peace with.  

Some friends have been around for a really long time.   These friends have seen the best of times and worst of times with me.  These are the friends that drove my car home for me when I was admitted to the psychiatric hospital, came to visit me there, and most importantly didn't treat me any differently when I was released.  I felt like the whole world thought I was crazy, and wouldn't want anything to do with me anymore.   There were some friends that avoided me after my stays in the psych.  hospital.  But these girls, my friends,  they treated me the same as always.   We've been together through school and learning to drive a car and boyfriends and marriages and babies and heartache and hard times and good times and are still able to laugh and enjoy one another.   It is a rare blessing for us all to stay in touch  for so many years.  For these friends, I am grateful 

Some friends are more recent.  We've shared child rearing advice and play dates and Bible studies and prayer groups and homeschooling ideas and Sunday afternoon gatherings and lots of tears and lots of laughter.  It is a blessing to have made so many friends who want to walk out this life with me.  For these friends, I am grateful.  

There are friends we pour our heart and soul out to and they gather us up,  hold us close and pour right back into us so we don't run dry.  There are friends who trust us enough to share the broken pieces of their life with us and we scoop them up and march them straight to the throne of grace.  We place them at the feet of Jesus, who is the only one who can piece them together, and we pick up each piece and hand it to Jesus until the work is finished.  There are friends who listen tirelessly as we cry and yell and scream and they look us right in the face and speak truth and grace and love to us.   They hold us up when we can not stand for one more minute.  They make us laugh when we only want to cry.  They forgive us when we have PMS and are beyond crabby.   They support us even when we head off in a different direction than they are walking.  They love us.   We love them.  What a blessing it is to have and be a friend.  For these friends, I am so grateful.

So many days seem to be passing so quickly and I find myself with less time than I have things I need to do.  I don't have the time to spend with my friends  the way I'd like to.  There are precious friends of mine that I haven't seen in so long.  There never seems to be enough time during this season of my life.  There is always so many things to do, children's sports and work and schooling and and and...  Somehow I'd like to stop it all, just for a little while and catch up with those friends I haven't seen in a while.  We always part with the promise to not wait so long to meet up again, but the years seem to pass us all right on by.  

 I'm grateful for facebook and email which have shortened miles and helped keep the connection I have with many friends.  I'm grateful for each friend I've had in my life-whether you've come and gone, or come and stayed.  I'm grateful for those friends who have seen the deepest parts of my heart and held me and prayed with me.  I'm grateful for those friends who trust me enough to share their hearts with me.   God has sprinkled my path of life with just the right people at just the right time, so I could love and be loved, so I could have friends and be a friend to others.  For this, I am so very grateful.

Thanks for reading.

On turning 40...

Forty isn't old, if you're a tree-anonymous 

Today I turn 40, the big 4-0.  I'd love to impress you with all the cool things I did to usher in a new decade, but I spent the last day of my 30s pretty uneventfully.  I cleaned some things around the house, did some laundry, got myself a coffee on my way into work, and spent the afternoon and evening at work-with people MUCH older than 40.   Suddenly, 40 didn't seem so old after all.  Ahhh, perspective.     After work, I came home and said "goodbye" to my 30s.    I thought about some things.  I thought about a lot of things.  

I clearly remember when I was about to turn 30.  That was a hard birthday.  I knew I was supposed to really be a grown up and have my act together at 30, but I wasn't even anywhere close to having much of anything together.   I thought, well maybe I'd have it figured out when I hit 40.  Now I'm 40 and the more I learn the less I feel I really know.   

But that's OK.  At 40 I'm not thinking about how I'm going to figure things out anymore.  I don't need to.  Figuring things out isn't really working for me.  Trusting and believing and staying true to the One who knit me together,  planned out every one of my days, and wrote them in a book before I was even born-that's where I need to keep my focus. (Psalm 139:13-16)  Even when I don't understand, I just need to keep walking-walking ahead, walking through the pain in the night and walking in the joy that comes in the morning, walking through "goodbyes", walking through endings, walking through new beginnings, walking in the wind and rain and sunshine and warm breezes alike, walking the course that has been set before me, and following the examples of those who are faithful in their walk and those who have been faithful and have finished their course.   Just walking faithfully in His plan for my life, no matter what lies ahead.

I am blessed to have others that link their arms with mine and choose to walk with me.   God has made us and fashioned us for relationships, with Himself and with each other.   I'm grateful for those I call friends(family included).   One of my heart-sister friends introduced me, some time ago, to Patty Griffin (one of my favorite artists)  She has this song called 10 million miles, that I love love love.  
"I must've walked 10 million miles" and I'm sure I have at least as many miles left to walk.   And so even when I don't understand my path I must keep walking.   When the clouds are blocking the light and I don't know which way this path is leading, when I can only see directly in front of me,  I must keep walking.   My friends, let us walk on in the path that is set before us.  Let's  not veer off, even if another way  looks better, even if the path we are on is suddenly looking pretty scary, even if we lose people along the way,  even if our path is rough and we see  pain up ahead, let us stay the course.   Because we know that He works ALL things out for our good when we love Him and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28) Even when we may feel alone,  let's remember that  He has promised to never leave or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5).  
At 40 years old I am so grateful that I have never walked a single mile alone.  Thank you to all my friends who have walked with me.  I "search for your sweet face" as I walk, for encouragement to keep on keepin' on.  

And friends, if I should  start to repeat to you the same story I told you yesterday, or start discussing my popping knee joint and sore back, or worse yet, continuously discuss how often my bowels move, all I can say is I'm 40 and walking 10 million miles takes its toll.

Thanks for reading.

Accessories

I'm like a deer in headlights at the accessory counter.  I just can't pick things out.  Thankfully I have friends whose motto must be "Friends don't let friends go around un-accessorized", because  much of the jewelry I have has come from my friends.  One friend, in particular, has taken pity on my inability to accessorize properly and given me several pieces of jewelry to wear.

While I was getting ready the other day, I noticed I wasn't wearing any accessories with my outfit.  I looked through my jewelry box to find a necklace to go with my outfit.  As I pulled out a necklace that my friend had given me and put it on, I felt like I was getting a hug from her.  I thought of all the things we have both been through together since we met.  I was overcome with thankfulness to the Lord for bringing her into my life.  I have walked with her through some pretty awful things, and she has done the same for me.  Always finding a reason to laugh together, even in the toughest times, has been good medicine for us.  I was having a particularly difficult time that morning, but when I put that necklace on, it made me smile.  I felt the gift of friendship all day as I wore the necklace she had given me and it got me thinking (insert shudder here).

Years ago, I was probably 8 years old or so, I received a gift from a lady I went to church with.  She was an elderly woman, a widow, who sat in the second row on the left every Sunday.  Her name was Mrs. Angel and she was one of the sweetest people I had known.  Every week I would wander over to the pew where she sat and chat with her (I was a chatter box kid-I know you are surprised right?).  She was always kind.  She always listened to me and talked to me in return.  She loved the Lord and she loved people.  Her sweet spirit made a lasting impression on my young heart.  Not long before she passed away, she gave me a few things.  One of those things was a necklace.

I thought it was the most beautiful thing in the whole world, not so much because of how it looked, but because it made me feel important.  She made me feel like I was worth something, and I still treasure her gift to this day.  When I put it on, I am reminded of how love can cross generations.  I am reminded of how a simple gift of listening, loving and giving of time can have a lasting impact on someone else.  I am reminded that God can use us throughout our entire lifetime to make a difference in the lives of others.  Mrs. Angel is a part of my heart, not because she gave me this tangible gift, but because this tangible gift reminds me of the intangible gifts of love and kindness she gave every week to a little girl at church.

Another friend of mine gave me a gift a couple of years ago.  She made this necklace for me.

I met this friend through homeschooling and our husbands were also on the fire department together.  She was a great source of  encouragement when schooling my children felt like an impossible task.   She also helped me organize.  She and another friend of ours came to my house and got me "into shape" helping me organize my materials and books and closets and and and..   She has a great sense of humor and has never failed to make me laugh.  When I look at all the teeny tiny beads on this necklace that she had to string, I am so grateful for her gift.  When I wear this heart, that sits close to my own, I'm reminded of friendship and laughter and how we need those things to walk through this life.  I'm reminded of her faith through the tough times she has went through.  Her love for the Lord and her faith in His plan have always been strong, even in the face of much adversity.   Hearing her testimony of God's faithfulness in her life has made my faith grow as well.  She has since moved away and I don't get to see her very often, but when I put on the necklace, I feel her friendship and I'm so grateful that the Lord has placed her in my life.

My sister bought me this bracelet.

It was made and sold as a fundraiser to fight teen depression.  It has one word on the ribbon- HOPE.  When I wear it I often put the ribbon between my thumb and finger and hold on to the word-HOPE.  My sister's gift is so special to me.  As I struggle with my own bouts of depression and anxiety, I put that bracelet on and am reminded that there is hope.  I am reminded of Jeremiah 29:11.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you plans to give you hope and a future.
As I twirl that word-HOPE- in my fingers I make a decision to trust in the plans the Lord has for my life-even though I don't understand them at times.  I put my hope in the Lord and rest in the promise that He has good things for me, and His plans are always good.


During an incredibly difficult time in my life, I received a gift for Christmas from a couple who had taken me into their family.  It was a necklace with this charm on it.

During this time in my life, I felt worthless and often called myself a "Loser".  So they bought this and said "L doesn't stand for loser anymore, it stands for "Loved".   During a time when I was unable to receive love from the Lord, he placed some people into my life to show His love to me.  This couple, which became parents to me, were two of those people.  When my daughter was a baby, she yanked on the chain and broke it, but thankfully I didn't lose the charm.  When I see it, I am reminded of the love the Lord has for His children.  I'm reminded of how much He loves us, and how He will stop at nothing to make sure we understand how much He loves us.  He will send us friends, family and friends who become family to be sure we know He loves us.  He is the giver of all good things and the source of love.

No matter how insignificant we feel we may be, God has a bigger plan and maybe, just maybe, that small gift you have to give-the smile, the kind word, the encouragement to a friend, the time spent talking with a child-maybe that will be the very thing He uses to pour life and hope and love into the life of someone else.  Never think what you have to give isn't good enough or big enough.  If God is in it, it is always bigger than we know.   God often uses the smallest things to make the biggest impacts (think of the little boy's lunch in Matthew 14).

I suppose if  burglars came into my home and searched through my jewelry box, they would walk away disappointed.  But to me, my jewelry box is full of treasures.  It is full of love, and friendship and family and hope.

And I am so thankful for every piece.


Thanks for reading.