Homeschooling Humor

Homeschooling.  It is more than a movement for some of us.  It is a way of life.  I've heard and read LOTS of arguments on the issue of homeschooling.  Some say it is so much better for the child.  Some say it is so much worse for the child.  I have had conversations with people on both ends of the argument, but I have found that most position themselves somewhere in the middle of things.

I'm not one to waste a lot of my time and energy arguing with people.  If you choose to believe that teaching your own children is wrong, I will not try to convince you otherwise. Nor will I adhere to the belief that ALL children should be home educated.  It is not a choice that will work out favorably for everyone. 

What I WILL say is that homeschooling is our way of life.    I do believe that it is the best choice for our family, and so that is what we do.

I approach homeschooling the children much like I approach the rest of my life, with a good amount of fear, a whole lot of prayer, and a sense of humor.  It is a difficult journey sometimes.  Talk to most homeschooling moms and they will tell you it is not easy.  But most will also tell you they wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

Years ago my sister gave me a book by Todd Wilson called Lies Homeschooling Moms Believe.  Anyone reading this blog who needs some encouragement, I highly recommend this book.  Todd Wilson also wrote 4 volumes of The Official Book of Homeschooling Cartoons  that I flip through often when I need a laugh. 

I wanted to share some of those cartoons with you all.  If you are homeschooling your children, chances are you will relate to some of these.  If you are not, you will get a small peek into a world that is different than your own.  In any case I hope these bring a smile to your face.

Oh boy!  I sound like this lady sometimes.

Just last week my son sat at the pediatrician's office and when the Dr. asked what he was learning in school this year he replied "Oh nothing really".  Yup.  It was a proud moment.

One day you may pick up the phone to call me and I will not answer because I will be just like the woman on this page.

Yea, we have these kind of  "school uniforms" too.  It cuts down on laundry that I don't have time to do.

Yes, poor hubby has come home from a hard day at work to a scene similar to this one.

  I'm afraid this is really what's going on in the heads of my children while I drone on and on.  

While it may take me an hour to explain what an adjective is and I just may exhaust myself explaining fractions  while my child contemplates the size of my nose.  I wouldn't want it any other way.  There is a peace in the chaos of everyday life when I am living it out the way God has planned for our family.   Hubby may come home to the occasional frozen supper.  He may  find us still in our jammies while he trips over the array of school books  and world maps sprinkled all over the living room floor.  On those days, he just says "OK kids, looks like we are ordering pizza tonight." 

It is an organized chaos, but we are all together in it.  Learning together.  Growing together.  I'm so grateful that God has given me this opportunity.  Though the task is not easy, it is worth it.   His strength is made perfect in our weakness, and there are LOTS of opportunities in our school day for His strength to shine through.  

On those tough days, I remind myself how fast the years are moving; that they are only children once in their lifetime; and that one day they will be gone and I won't have to explain long division EVER AGAIN-insert a great big HALLELUJAH here.  Those reminders get me through the tough days.  

And I treasure the good days.  The days when I don't allow the stress get to me and I can just enjoy listening to my son read to me and laugh at the story he is reading.  

Even the dog joins in sometimes(though he doesn't look very interested).

It's an adventure, and I have the greatest crew in the world going along with me.

Thanks for reading.

*all cartoons were by Todd Wilson and you can check out his website at familymanweb.com

January winds

Bitter cold air.

Snow covering the grass.

Boots, snow pants, mittens and hats strewn about my living room.

Yes, winter has officially arrived.  It IS January after all, and I DO live in Michigan-so this should come as no surprise.  We've had such a mild December and January thus far that I almost forgot that it is winter.  Almost forgot, but not entirely.

My heart knows it's January.  January and I have a rocky relationship.  So much so that I almost hate to see it arrive.  The bitter cold winds of January have blown in some incredibly difficult times throughout my life.  

It was in January when I was 16 years old, I stood beside my Mamaw for days as she lay dying in the hospital.  It was late one January night when she drew in her last breath as I stood holding her hand.  It was that same January night that I saw my dad cry heaving sobs of grief and my aunts and cousins cry in overwhelming sorrow at the loss of their mother.   It was a few days later in January that Auntie V and I held onto one another so that both of us could stand, while we said our final "until we meet again" to this woman we both loved so much.  My Mamaw was my buddy and I still find myself missing her.

It was in January when I was 20 years old  that I had come to a place of such despair that I had given up on life completely.  I found myself in the psychiatric unit of a hospital for attempted suicide(this was the first in a long battle of depression and suicidal thinking and attempts).  It was one of the coldest winters that year.   It was that same January that my life was forever changed.  Circumstances in my life had reached a breaking point, my heart and soul were completely shattered into a million pieces, and I truly believed that my life was over.  I had lost all hope that my future would be anything but miserable.

To quote my mama's  favorite saying "But God".

God intervened and although circumstances were still broken, as were my heart and soul,  He made a way for healing and restoration.   God has redeemed the lost years and has worked (and continues to work) a miracle in my heart and life.  It was not quick.  It was not painless.  It was not pretty.  But in the end, the result of all that I have been through is a life filled with many testimonies of God's faithfulness.

Now 18 years later, it's January once again and I find myself in a state of transition.  In case you haven't gotten the memo on this blog of mine, I'm not a fan of change.  I like things to stay the same (I may have mentioned this a few hundred times on here).  But times they are a-changin', and I have found myself this January struggling with those changes and also with those same old feelings of desperation.    Those feelings that say "You can't make it"  "You don't have what it takes"  "You are weak".  "You are not enough".  But I have learned something in these past 18 years.  I have learned that rather than fight those intense waves of depression and flail in the water in a desperate attempt to save myself,  I cry out "save me Jesus" then  I say to those feelings "It's OK if I don't have what it takes, and yes I am weak, and I am most certainly not enough, but I can make it because God is all that I am not and He is willing and able to rescue me."   I know now, from past experiences, that every trial, every pain, every disappointment and every tear will make their way back around to testify of God's faithfulness and love.  God has a plan and His plans are always good.

To be honest,  I have many days where depression and anxiety still get the best of me, and I find myself more often than I'd like to admit in a place of flailing and near drowning.  I too often fail to remember the lessons I've learned and cry out for help.  Too often I look around at the storm and not on the hand reaching down to rescue me.  To fail to mention those struggles may lead you to think that I have it all together, and rest assured I do not.  But that's really the most beautiful thing of all isn't it?  That none of us really have it all together, but God does.  And while I am no where near where I want to be, I am so much better than I used to be.

Friends, when things look the darkest and the most hopeless, do not give up.  Never think for one moment that God can't turn things around.  I know He can take the most hopeless of circumstances and turn it into something beautiful.  It may not be quick, it may not be painless, it may not even be pretty, but in the end it will be beautiful.

I love this song.  Especially the part that says  "I have come undone, but I have just begun, changing by your grace"... God has blessed me beyond what I could have ever asked Him for, and the best part is that He's not through with me yet.  He is so good.
He can take anything we are willing to give Him and make it beautiful.

Thanks for reading.

So long 2011

So long 2011, glad to see you go.  Don't let the door hit you on the way out.  I don't mean to be so unkind toward you, but you really haven't been very friendly either.   I can't say that I will regret parting ways with you.  I will say that I have learned quite a lot in your span of time-some good things, others not so great.  All the same, it is time to say our goodbyes-and I can't say that I'm brokenhearted about that!

2011.  It was the best of times.  It was the worst of times.  Some things good, some bad, but when I look at the big picture- all things 2011 have been used to help me learn and grow. 

2011 has had me in the fire.  You know that fire that refines and tests your faith.

1 Peter 1:6-7
⁶ In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. ⁷ These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.

Yea, not really a fan of the fire.  I have to say.  Sometimes I've even heard myself say "But I don't want to grow and be more like Jesus if it hurts like this."  Not really one of my finer moments, but true nonetheless. 


This past summer, as many of you know, had my little family turned upside down.  My bonus son was involved in a terrible boating accident, which resulted in a summer full of surgeries and intense pain for him.  Watching him go through that was horrendous.  My heart broke a little more every day.  I felt so helpless.

But even in the middle of that, God showed His mercy and loving kindness to us all.    Hubby and I knew that the only reason our son was alive was because of God's own hand pulling him out of the water, and sustaining his life through the entire ordeal.  My bonus son is a walking, breathing miracle and testimony of God's faithfulness and power and mercy. 

My faith grew at least ten times its size this summer.  

I don't believe that God causes tragedies to happen, but I do believe that He uses every one to show us more about who He is.  And the great thing about God is that He promises to turn every situation into something good.  He gives us beauty for ashes (Isaiah 61:3), He works all things together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28). 

Life often times has a way of finding me hiding in the corner proclaiming my inability to walk out the path God has chosen for me.  Yup, I'm the one over there screaming saying "I can't do the things you are asking me to do" and "I'm not strong enough" and "I'm not wise enough" and "I'm just not enough."  This has been my mantra through all of 2011- and (if I'm completely honest) through all of my life.  
But the beauty of coming to the "end of my rope" so to speak  is that I can finally let go and allow God to be strong and wise and enough.  I have finally realized that God alone is able to be enough and I don't have to be anything on my own.  This (and more) I have learned in the fire of 2011. 

I have a friend who makes beautiful designs out of pieces of broken glass.  Whenever I see a mosaic, it reminds me that some of the most beautiful things are made from broken pieces.  And while she makes beautiful pieces of art, only God can pick up the broken pieces of our soul and piece them back together and make us into something beautiful.  I have realized, this year, that it's only when I am completely broken that He can transform who I thought I should be into who He created me to be.    He does make all things beautiful in His time.  He makes all things new.  But only when we come to the end of ourselves.  

All of my broken dreams, and hopes and plans I now surrender into the hands of the only One who can make something beautiful out of the broken pieces of my life.  

This summer another friend of mine shared a song with me that helped her when she was going through a difficult time with a family member who was ill.   It also ministered to me   I'm so thankful that she shared it with me, so I want to share it too.  It's called "Strong Enough" by Matthew West.

 So while I'm not sad to see 2011 go, I'm grateful for the lessons God has taught me this year.  I'm looking forward to 2012 with hope of seeing His plans fulfilled in my life. 

Happy 2012 friends, may God piece together your lives as well.  He is good.  All the time.

Thanks for reading.

Accessories

I'm like a deer in headlights at the accessory counter.  I just can't pick things out.  Thankfully I have friends whose motto must be "Friends don't let friends go around un-accessorized", because  much of the jewelry I have has come from my friends.  One friend, in particular, has taken pity on my inability to accessorize properly and given me several pieces of jewelry to wear.

While I was getting ready the other day, I noticed I wasn't wearing any accessories with my outfit.  I looked through my jewelry box to find a necklace to go with my outfit.  As I pulled out a necklace that my friend had given me and put it on, I felt like I was getting a hug from her.  I thought of all the things we have both been through together since we met.  I was overcome with thankfulness to the Lord for bringing her into my life.  I have walked with her through some pretty awful things, and she has done the same for me.  Always finding a reason to laugh together, even in the toughest times, has been good medicine for us.  I was having a particularly difficult time that morning, but when I put that necklace on, it made me smile.  I felt the gift of friendship all day as I wore the necklace she had given me and it got me thinking (insert shudder here).

Years ago, I was probably 8 years old or so, I received a gift from a lady I went to church with.  She was an elderly woman, a widow, who sat in the second row on the left every Sunday.  Her name was Mrs. Angel and she was one of the sweetest people I had known.  Every week I would wander over to the pew where she sat and chat with her (I was a chatter box kid-I know you are surprised right?).  She was always kind.  She always listened to me and talked to me in return.  She loved the Lord and she loved people.  Her sweet spirit made a lasting impression on my young heart.  Not long before she passed away, she gave me a few things.  One of those things was a necklace.

I thought it was the most beautiful thing in the whole world, not so much because of how it looked, but because it made me feel important.  She made me feel like I was worth something, and I still treasure her gift to this day.  When I put it on, I am reminded of how love can cross generations.  I am reminded of how a simple gift of listening, loving and giving of time can have a lasting impact on someone else.  I am reminded that God can use us throughout our entire lifetime to make a difference in the lives of others.  Mrs. Angel is a part of my heart, not because she gave me this tangible gift, but because this tangible gift reminds me of the intangible gifts of love and kindness she gave every week to a little girl at church.

Another friend of mine gave me a gift a couple of years ago.  She made this necklace for me.

I met this friend through homeschooling and our husbands were also on the fire department together.  She was a great source of  encouragement when schooling my children felt like an impossible task.   She also helped me organize.  She and another friend of ours came to my house and got me "into shape" helping me organize my materials and books and closets and and and..   She has a great sense of humor and has never failed to make me laugh.  When I look at all the teeny tiny beads on this necklace that she had to string, I am so grateful for her gift.  When I wear this heart, that sits close to my own, I'm reminded of friendship and laughter and how we need those things to walk through this life.  I'm reminded of her faith through the tough times she has went through.  Her love for the Lord and her faith in His plan have always been strong, even in the face of much adversity.   Hearing her testimony of God's faithfulness in her life has made my faith grow as well.  She has since moved away and I don't get to see her very often, but when I put on the necklace, I feel her friendship and I'm so grateful that the Lord has placed her in my life.

My sister bought me this bracelet.

It was made and sold as a fundraiser to fight teen depression.  It has one word on the ribbon- HOPE.  When I wear it I often put the ribbon between my thumb and finger and hold on to the word-HOPE.  My sister's gift is so special to me.  As I struggle with my own bouts of depression and anxiety, I put that bracelet on and am reminded that there is hope.  I am reminded of Jeremiah 29:11.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you plans to give you hope and a future.
As I twirl that word-HOPE- in my fingers I make a decision to trust in the plans the Lord has for my life-even though I don't understand them at times.  I put my hope in the Lord and rest in the promise that He has good things for me, and His plans are always good.


During an incredibly difficult time in my life, I received a gift for Christmas from a couple who had taken me into their family.  It was a necklace with this charm on it.

During this time in my life, I felt worthless and often called myself a "Loser".  So they bought this and said "L doesn't stand for loser anymore, it stands for "Loved".   During a time when I was unable to receive love from the Lord, he placed some people into my life to show His love to me.  This couple, which became parents to me, were two of those people.  When my daughter was a baby, she yanked on the chain and broke it, but thankfully I didn't lose the charm.  When I see it, I am reminded of the love the Lord has for His children.  I'm reminded of how much He loves us, and how He will stop at nothing to make sure we understand how much He loves us.  He will send us friends, family and friends who become family to be sure we know He loves us.  He is the giver of all good things and the source of love.

No matter how insignificant we feel we may be, God has a bigger plan and maybe, just maybe, that small gift you have to give-the smile, the kind word, the encouragement to a friend, the time spent talking with a child-maybe that will be the very thing He uses to pour life and hope and love into the life of someone else.  Never think what you have to give isn't good enough or big enough.  If God is in it, it is always bigger than we know.   God often uses the smallest things to make the biggest impacts (think of the little boy's lunch in Matthew 14).

I suppose if  burglars came into my home and searched through my jewelry box, they would walk away disappointed.  But to me, my jewelry box is full of treasures.  It is full of love, and friendship and family and hope.

And I am so thankful for every piece.


Thanks for reading.

Something Different This Way Comes

Today when I went to get my hair trimmed I went way radical.  OK, so maybe not way radical, but I did have my stylist cut me some bangs.  I haven't had bangs in years.  These new little hairs keep growing in the front and they have been driving me crazy, so I thought maybe some bangs would blend in with the new growth better.  They do, but I'm not used to them quite yet.  They feel a little awkward.  I keep brushing them away to try and mimic my previous style.  I will eventually stop sweeping them to the side and allow them their own spot on my forehead, but it may take a few days. 

See, I'm a whole lot  little reluctant to change things around, even something as simple as my hair.  I'm sure I've mentioned this before.  I know it's kind of a recurring theme in this blog (sheesh enough already right?).   I just like things to stay the same.  That way I know what to expect and I'm usually not disappointed.  Even if things aren't great, it doesn't matter so much because they are the same and I know what's coming.

 Sometimes I think of how I wish things would change, but then when I'm faced with the challenge to initiate my part in the change, I choke.  Even the most difficult situations are often easier to remain in than to initiate any part in changing them.  To know what is expected, to know what's coming, to know even that  negative things are inevitable is often an easier pill to swallow than the pill of the unknown.  Sometimes I wonder if that was one reason that Jesus asked the 38year invalid  laying by the pool of Bethesda (John chapter 5) if he wanted to be healed.  I wonder if He was like "Hey, are you really ready for everything to be different?"  That would be a valid question if it were me laying by that pool.  I wonder what my answer would've been? 

Please don't misunderstand, this is NOT a trait I value in myself.  In fact, just the opposite is true.  I want to be able to accept the inevitable changes that occur in life  with less heartache.  I want to be able to initiate change in situations I feel need changing, and be able to move on if a situation cannot be changed.    I want to be brave, but like my friend Piglet says "It's hard to be brave when you're only a very small animal."  and I so often feel so very small. 

But this I know, changes are coming.  Some have already taken place and I am not even close well on my way to adjusting to them.  Others I see off in the distance making their way to my reluctant heart.  I pray I will have the courage to embrace them, or at the very least not run screaming  in the opposite direction from them.  Because this I also know, some of the greatest work done in my heart has been worked in by the heartache of a major change in my life.  A friend of mine once quoted this to me and I often remember it when I sense changes coming.

You will remain the same  until the pain of remaining the same is greater than the pain of change.

Today I will accept those new bangs and work with them until they become a comfortable part of who I am. And I will continue to pray for the Lord's direction in the bigger changes I know are coming. I will remember the words Moses spoke to the people of Israel In Deuteronomy 31:8

⁸ The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.

I may be a very small animal, but the Lord is mighty and He will not leave me all alone.

Thanks for reading.

Never Alone

To all my friends out there who feel alone in their struggle with  depression, this  message is for you.

You are not Alone

I see you sitting in the darkness alone
I see you wipe the tears from your face
I see the regret you hold your heart
I see the things time could not erase

I hear when you say "I'm not enough"
I hear when you say "I can not go on"
I hear your heart cry for some other way
I hear when you say "I'm already gone"

I feel the desperate beat of your heart
I feel the pain of the way that you live
I feel the discouragement that shadows your soul
I feel the burden as you work to forgive

I know that you so often feel powerless
I know that you feel you should've been strong
I know that you feel you should have done more
I know that you think that you are so wrong

I see you and hear you, you are never alone
I am here with you bearing the weight
I feel your desperation and know all your longings
I know that you're broken, but  it's never too late

Hold onto me, and stay in my love
Hold onto the ones who love you for you
Hold onto the truth that you have been taught
Hold onto my hand, and I will bring you through.


Isaiah 41:13
“For I am the LORD your God, who upholds your right hand,
Who says to you, ‘Do not fear, I will help you.’

You bring me Joy

This is it.

Tonight is my Sweet Pea's last night of being a single digit girl.  Tomorrow she will be 10.

Wow.  10 years have gone by already.  Seems strange, when I look at her,  to think that she is the same sweet baby I brought home 10 years ago.  Then I look right at her face, and it doesn't seem strange at all.

Of my three, she is by far the most laid back.  As an infant, she slept on her own right away-unlike her siblings.  She woke up happy and singing to herself as a toddler.  She played often by herself quietly.  She was so quiet in the car that I often checked and re-checked to make sure I hadn't left her behind.

She isn't always quiet now though.  When she gets the giggles look out.  She laughs uncontrollably with no reserve.  While it is sometimes madly inappropriate, there's something about watching her laugh that makes me smile.

 She is often in her own world-much like I was at her age.  There's that saying, you know, the one that talks about marching to the beat of a different drummer.  Yea, well my Sweet Pea doesn't march at all.  She dances to the sound of a flute or something.

When my children were babies, I would often sing to them.  With each child came a special song, one that I would sing over and over to them in particular.  Sweet Pea's song is You Bring Me Joy by Anita Baker.  That is the song I would sing to her over and over, and it is still the song in my heart when I think about her.  Her gentle spirit, her giggles, her dance through life, these all bring joy to my heart.

You bring me joy, when I'm down oh, so much joy
When I lose my way your love comes smiling on me
I saw your face and then I knew we would be friends
I was so afraid, but your arms they said come to me


Being a parent has been one terrific, yet horribly frightening ride for me.  A ride that has left me, on more than one occasion, begging the operator to let me off of NOW!  But it is also one that has brought with it so much joy, and much of that joy is found in the gentle, giggling, dancing girl I call Sweet Pea.

                                           My sweet pea at 2 months

                                           My Sweet Pea with her dog on her last day of being 9

Happy Birthday Sweet Pea.  I love you.  You bring me joy.